Elevator etiquette.

Of all of the intricacies that make up Hong Kong's, or maybe contemporary Asian culture in general, one of my favorite notes has to be what I call the "Asian Elevator Scramble".

It's definitely an indication of the society's constant move to not only constantly move, but move in a means that is obsessed with punctuality.

Elevators are built to deal with this need. In America, we take the elevator out of convenience, a fun way to get up the stairs at close to or a bit faster than the standard stairs after you factor the wait in the elevator lobby, the slow habit of pressing the buttons (or all of them, like in Elf), the tendency to look at the ceiling or exchange casualties with your partners on the elevator for a brief stay, and then lackadaisically exiting and getting on your way.

Well, it's a bit different here. Here's why:
1. In most cases, the lift (not the elevator) is necessary. There are a lot of floors to move, and they were designed with break-neck engineering to get you places faster than your feet.

2. Since they're faster, everyone uses them. Personal space? No.

3. Since everyone uses them, they make a lot of stops up and down, oftentimes only for one more person to try to squeeze in. And, being taller than everyone in the elevator, I find it quite comical.

4. Because there are so many stops, people get impatient that they'll be late to their destination. As such, it is typical for the first person in the lift to walk in and directly next to the buttons to hit the destination, wait for everyone to get in, and begin hitting the "close doors" button like a madman. This button is hit at least twenty times at each floor arrival.

5. Seeing as everyone has a use for that button, it's quite responsive. The door shuts immediately after pressing it for the first or second time. The other 18 clicks are just to make sure it keeps going.

6. Since elevators are part of everyday life, and everyone is there, you might as well continue your conversation occurring before the elevator to in it with people all around. After all, I sure don't know Cantonese.

7. The bell rings, and you have to be moving by the time the door opens. Otherwise, you get caught in the frantic pace of a million people entering a lift and another million leaving, as if they don't do this multiple times per day. Don't hesitate. Just leave. It's a massacre in there.

Maybe I read too much into little things like the AES, but hey, it's for my enjoyment anyway. After all, I've got plenty of time to get where I need to be.